Tag Archive: peace



She was floating in the middle of a lake, the most beautiful color of blue she had ever seen. The water was so still and serene. The lake was surrounded by tiny white crystals of sand, the beautiful smooth feeling sand of the tropics not the coarse sand of the Northeast. As she was floating she could see all way down to the bottom, seeing the reflection of the small pebbles on the bottom in the sun.

She was out there alone, immobile in peace. She had nowhere to go, nobody to see, no responsibilities at the moment. She was in complete peacefulness. A beautiful serenity enveloped her. She had such a beautiful time floating around aimlessly drinking in all the beauty. She was floating far enough out there where nothing could reach her except a cool, gentle breeze. She felt so safe and secure out there floating around. It was as if nothing could reach her and she could just find a moment’s peace. Floating, floating, floating. She wanted to bottle that feeling so that she could feel it all the time.

And then she opened her eyes in her living room. Namaste.



I’ve been working on peace ornaments and peace pillows trying to bring myself some peace the last few days. It has not been easy but try I must. I believe the world is in a whole heap of trouble and we need to end the chaos within ourselves to fix it. I don’t watch the news anymore. I monitor very carefully what I let in, but you really can’t avoid what is going on unless you live in a cave in the middle of nowhere or a Tibetan mountaintop.

The latest is yet another mass shooting. Why do these things happen? I will never know, we can blame it on guns, we can blame it on mental illness or we can blame it on ourselves. We are a society that likes our toys and our beliefs and when the two mesh together bedlam occurs. But we are the masters of our own ship, the captains of our destiny. At least that is what we wish for, but how many people live the life they’ve imagined?

We grow up with dreams and ideals and then we let them slide while we look for a real job so we can be productive. Where has that lead us? To rampant unemployment and the biggest gap between the rich and the poor in history. What does that do to our countrymen? It makes them lose hope, lose faith, lose their self esteem and move into a never ending cycle of not having enough, not being enough.

Our kids learned this from us too. I think youthful optimism is still available and I know I am youthfully optimistic even though I’m a realist along with being an idealist. But so many people who have played by the rules, gotten a job, gotten married, had the children, the white picket fence are watching it disappear and they just can’t handle it. Who can they blame? I guess it’s easy to blame the non documented workers that took their laboring jobs or the companies that outsource their jobs to countries which don’t play the same rules the United States does, but it’s actually bigger than that it’s self responsibility. We shop in Walmart, we eat animals manufactured specifically to be killed(could you eat the family dog), we allow poisons to be rained down on us to kill the mosquitos, we hang onto our guns for hope that if the government or a rampant gang of terrorists might come knocking at our door we will be ready. But are we ready? No not even close, all we are doing is killing ourselves, killing the environment, and creating an anxiety ridden society who is one crisis away from shooting up another building and unfortunately we have the guns to do it.

I want to be optimistic, I want to be at peace but I’m an empath so even if I don’t watch the news, or don’t read the newspaper I feel the chaos of the world inside myself. I hear the voices of my friends and countrymen who wonder what will happen to them if they lose their job? What will happen to their kids if the economy doesn’t improve? What will happen if a flood takes away their home or if we end up in yet another endless war. Since 9/11/2001 everything seems like an endless war and we’ve made everyone else the enemy, but the truth is we are the enemy. We allow it to happen. We look at others who haven’t coped and we pass judgment. But sooner or later that other will be us, we are all in this together. There are not enough toys or drugs to save us from ourselves. We have to do it ourselves.

When the constitution was written it didn’t take into account all the changes in technology and weaponry that make this world dangerous at times. Nobody writing the constitution imagined a gun that could kill 20 schoolchildren in a matter of minutes. Nobody imagined technology that could make it rain or forecast the rain. Nobody imagined all the toxins available to kill all the bugs or make chickens big enough to feed millions. We let ourselves get carried away and now we are paying the price for it. It’s time to be simple again. To look in the mirror and say let’s just be peaceful today and do something that makes us happy and peaceful, no matter what that is.

I’m off the soapbox, nobody reads this stuff anyway. But now I’m going to hand embroider and bring a little more peace into my own life so I can practice what I preach. Find love, find peace, be happy

Finding Myself

I will admit I was lost for quite a while, wandering in the wilderness of the dark night of the soul.  I got to the point where I didn’t even know who I was anymore.  Getting a divorce, remembering abandonment issues and traumatic occurrences from your childhood will do that to you.  But  although it’s been a long hard slog I’m still surviving and starting to take baby steps and move back among the living. 

I’m stronger, still not sure I can rebuild my life in the place where I’ve lived for the last 10 years but trying to cobble together a life that I can take with me if I decide I can’t.  I’ve dipped my toes into the dating pool which I still don’t think I’m quite ready for.  I’ve seen my beautiful son a lot more and learned to forgive myself for not knowing the answers.  At this point I’m not even sure of the questions.  But that seems to be a theme for the world right now, all these interesting questions with no easy answers.  There is so much going on that chaos seems to be the in thing.  I think my only contribution to the greater good is to try and calm the chaos in my soul right now. Maybe that is the contribution everyone should make to the common good, find their own answers and find their own peace.  Then perhaps they can share their answers and help someone else. I can’t really do that at the moment but what I can say is that I am really one of the lucky ones. I have a little bit of leeway to ask the hard questions and try to come up with an answer that works.  A roof over my head, food in my kitchen, a son that loves me and a general feeling that life will get better.  So I don’t know what I will be doing for the next 20 or 30 years.  I think the answer to the next 20 or 30 years is to live in this moment and keep moving.   Maybe thinking of what will happen to you when you are 80 when you are 50 is overwhelming.  

So I’m going to try and write a bit more, try to meditate a lot more and try to understand how and why I ended up in this oh so dark place and bring some light to it all.   I’ll probably write about the same issues I’ve written about in the past but do it with a new appreciation for just how important it is for your words to be your words.

So my words to end this blog post are, love and peace are the answer.  I don’t know what the question is but peace and love are the answer.


I believe in a place called hope.  I believe in a place where ordinary people can do extraordinary things to help bring people back together.   I believe that people have been torn apart by their ideals, which have been co-opted by powerful people whose job is to divide and conquer.


I believe in a loving God.  I believe in a loving universe.  I believe in a world where Jesus feeds the hungry instead of supply side economics. How can we say we are Christian, Islamic, or any other religion and think that it is a good thing to have whole sections of the world living in hunger and famine?


I believe in a world where one crazy person with a gun cannot inflict so much pain in so many people in so little time.  How is it possible that in a world created by love, the right to have a gun can be used in such a way that year after year one crazy person with a gun can go on a shooting rampage and change the lives of hundreds of people?  Every person who had a child lost at Colombine has had a life that has been diminished by the loss of that one child.  Every person on the streets of Chicago who has lost a child to gun violence has had a life diminished by the loss of that one child.  Every person in Aurora who had a child killed by a man who believed he was the Joker in a Batman movie has had their lives diminished by the loss of a child.  How is it possible that a man mentally disabled enough to think he is a character in a movie is able to buy a gun in the first place?  Year after year we say prayers and have vigils and nothing gets done and more of our children die. They stopped the campaign for a day but does anybody think that either the Obama campaign or the Romney campaign will take on the NRA?  No.  We all cry for a day or two and then we think about our own rights to protect our own houses and we allow people who shouldn’t be able to buy guns to go out and buy them.  When do the gun owners who only use their guns responsibly say enough is enough and use their voices to stop the hold the NRA has on our politics?


I believe in a world where 19 people cannot fly a plane into a building and start a decade of carnage, greed, death and destruction so huge and so vast that complete religions which all started with the same universal laws pick sides and cheer on the warriors.  In the 10 years since 9/11 how many people have died because of those 19 lives?  How many people have decided to avenge the deaths of their children and have turned against a country which was loved in those days following 9/11 because they don’t understand why they had to lose their son or daughter to 19 hijackers a world away?    I believe in a world where we honor the military but only use their services in the way that would reflect what most people believe in.  In the 1940s a war was used to erase one sick man’s twisted version of the world.  He was able to make an entire country believe it was in their best interest to round up an entire religion and eliminate it.  I learned about that when I was in the 5th grade and yet isn’t that what we are doing to the Islamic religion today?  There are loving and peaceful Muslims who love their children enough to seek peace.


I could write a book on the world issues that plague us at this time in history.  There are so many things the people of the world agree about.  We are peaceful, loving people who live most of our lives in obscurity.  We wake up every morning all over the globe and love, feed and clothe our children.  We breathe the same air that blows from one continent to the next.  We make love, sleep, eat, and pray every single day with the same universal physiology.  And yet, all we hear about day after day is how different we are and how it is our rights against theirs.


I am a hand embroidery artist in Upstate NY who writes a blog, how come I can figure out these huge questions and people in power who can make a difference don’t seem to ever utter the words of my typewriter?  Why?  Isn’t any one of these children and any one of these families important enough to take on universal themes which all religions are based on?  I know I’m a little fish in a big pond called earth but really people why?


Now before you say I’m Pollyanna and only a mere mortal who embroiders for a living.  I will tell you that in my little corner of the world, I make peace with my friends and relatives who believe something different than I do every day.  I love them and look at all the things we have in common and I don’t really care whether they vote differently than I do.  I treat everyone I meet during my ordinary days with respect, compassion and a smile.  I believe every person deserves respect and compassion no matter who they are.  I practice forgiveness every day and try not to hold grudges for the most part.  I like to hug.  I get up every morning with a song in my heart and hopefully a needle in my hand.  It’s not very easy to be an artist these days.  We have become a society which values nothing except money, even Michelangelo has been knocked off ten million times.


But once again I have to ask, why am I writing this blog post and nobody in power has the same words coming out of their mouths?  It’s sad really, very sad.  As people we value the same things, as a society we value nothing.

How Fragile We Are

How fragile we are is a line from the song Fragile by Sting.  It is a reminder that we as people are one.  We are all fragile somewhere in our beings.  Not one of us has a stone where our hearts should be.  We can pretend that we are strong and we do not hurt but every single one of us loves something and wants to be loved by someone.

So how do we get from that feeling of fragility and love to a war filled universe?  It’s hard to imagine that this is what God expected from us when he created the world in 7 days, isn’t it?  A place where wars rage on, poverty rages on, atrocities to children rage on, a place where a fragile heart can be broken in a minute just by watching the evening news.

The only way we can counteract the terrible actions of a few is to isolate the few from the whole of us here in the universe.  To speak out in love and peace.  To start a PEACEFUL revolution.  One that sees the commonalities of all in the singular existence of one.

Imagine that there is so much more that unites an Islamic child living in Iraq and a Christian child living in Mississippi than divides them.  Imagine that every morning we wake up to the sun or rain somewhere in the universe.  We wake up, if we are able to read this then we are awake.  That alone is unity.  That alone is peace if we look for it.

At times it must make God and universe just want to cry at the divisions we make from the whole.  The divisions of location, religion, all the way down to the bully in the schoolyard.  We are taught to believe we are special from the moment we are old enough to think, and then life just washes it away bit by bit.  Either confirm to the masses or risk having your french fries called freedom fries.  It’s just a matter of words used differently.

Love is love everywhere no matter what language it is said in.  Peace is peace no matter what language it is said in.  And unfortunately war is war no matter what language it is said in.  Be love, be peace, be universal.